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Beginners Guide to Anal Sex Toys

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Beginners Guide to anal sex toys

know your your anal toys

Find out everything you ned to know about anal sex toys from Naughty Stash ❤️

If you feel that your sex life is a little vanilla then you might want to start experimenting with anal sex toys.  Or, as a guy, you might want to explore the pathway to anal sex with another guy.  A quick look at the internet will bring up literally hundreds of different types of anal sex toy, it can feel a bit overwhelming so where is the best place to start?  Start at the beginning with some anal training.

What is anal training?

With the best will in the world, your butt was never intended to have any role other than the departure lounge for your intestines.  But, anal play and anal sex can be very sensual, fulfilling and rewarding if you get it right.  Because of the difference between the anus and the vagina, most experts recommend a period of anal training so that you get your body accustomed to what is going to follow.

The butt is not designed to have things inserted into it so the point of anal training is to teach you how to explore this brave new world safely and sensibly.  This involves learning how to play with anal sex toys to maximise your enjoyment.  The first thing you will need is an anal training kit. See our anal training guide for more info.

What is an anal training kit?

An anal training kit is usually a range of butt plugs of different sizes and some lube so you can experiment with different devices. But even before you go online to place your order, you can start to experiment with some finger play either solo or with your partner.  You may already have done this and be keen to learn more.

There is something so much more natural initially about a finger as it is skin on human tissue.  However you start, the most important thing you need to remember is that you will need lube and lots of it (view our butt plugs)

Why is lube so important for anal play with toys?

The rectum was never designed for things to go inside it, it was only designed to vacate stools so it does not naturally produce its own lubrication.  It is therefore really important that you use lots of lube both inserted internally and on the sex toy.  Don’t feel that using lube is some sort of failure, it really isn’t.

The type of lube you use will depend upon what the toy is made from.  Did you know that you shouldn’t use silicone lube on silicone sex toys, it kinda disintegrates them?  Many of the nicer butt plugs and anal beads are made of silicone so you have to use a water-based lube.  Also, if you use a condom at any point – some people use a condom if they have multiple partners – then some of these are also covered in lube so you need to check out what type or use condoms which are lube-free. 

If you don’t use lube then you will find anal play with a toy and anal sex almost impossible and very uncomfortable.  You run the risk of causing internal damage with tiny tears or fissures which can also harbour infection.

Flying solo

Whether you start with just your own fingers or you use butt plugs from an anal training kit, starting by yourself is a good way to test out the parameters without any pressure.  Because you are the one doing the inserting, you can gently explore what is comfortable, what is uncomfortable, which positions you like and whether you prefer one toy over another.

Anal sex toys may be a natural development in the relationship with your current partner or it may be something he or she is not interested in.  Like any new development in the bedroom, it has to be handled tactfully and with sensitivity.  And like many things you may do – preferences, favourites, twists or kinks – it is not a given that it will be happening every time you are intimate.

What other things can make anal play successful and fulfilling?

Almost as important as lube is the ability to relax so have a warm bath first or even better, start proceedings with an orgasm as that will really help you let go.  Some people feel more psychologically comfortable if they have had a bowel motion before they get going.  In fact, the likelihood of this disrupting play is very unlikely.  Stools only appear above the rectum when they are ready to leave otherwise they are some way away.  So if you don’t feel you need to go then don’t worry, don’t force yourself.

The anal muscles are very strong and their natural inclination is to want to eliminate anything present.  So the sensation can be a little odd at first which is why relaxation and timing are so important.  Anal sex toys are not something you want to use in a hurry that’s for sure.

Clear communication is important with any sex toy but particularly with anything around the anus.  Make your preferences known, what you like, what you don’t like.  Always stop if you feel pain as you could be causing some damage in there.

What’s next after the anal training kit?

You may find that the training kit contains is all that you need.  You don’t have to keep going bigger and bigger, it’s whatever is comfortable for you.  And some days that may just be no.  There are numerous variations on the butt plug, every colour and design within reason – most of them are teardrop-shaped.  Always choose one with a wide base, they are hardly likely to disappear without a trace but a wide base means you can operate it more easily.

If you want to progress beyond the training kit then here are some tips to guide you in the butt plug market:-

  • Try and buy silicone products because they are body-safe rather than inferior materials.  Some of these other materials are quite rigid and inflexible too
  • Glass and metal butt plugs are other alternatives, you can vary the temperature of these which can really enhance the sensation
  • Your butt plug can have a furry tailor they  can be bejewelled (particularly nice as a gift)
  • An expanding butt plug (probably not for newbies) is a nice feature.  These look quite different to the standard butt plug shape and they have little arms on a bulb-like base so do look rather like a flower.  The flower is closed to insert and then once inside, the soft and flexible arms are free to expand and spread out.  These are a real variation on a theme as they touch and stimulate areas of your butt that other plugs just cannot reach.  They are a good choice for someone who wants heightened sensation but struggles to accommodate a bigger plug
  • Hollow and tunnel butt plugs, a bit more unusual for those who are already experienced butt plug users, they look similar to a regular plug but are in fact hollow inside all the way up.  This means that you can insert a vibrator once the plug is in place.  Some people just get a huge turn on at the gape that they can produce and a real kink is the widest gape and how much that person can tolerate
  • Inflatable butt plugs with a tube attached to the base and a pump with a release valve to let the air back out again.  Some users say these are the best type of plug offering the ultimate stretch but within the contours of your own particular anatomy.  These are perfect for people who love the feel of a big plug but just can’t get one in
  • Vibrating butt plugs, a great combo of butt plug and vibrator, most have different pattern settings so you can change the pulse and remote control means you can change up the setting whilst it is still being worn.  Because there are electrical component, some care is required that these are kept dry from moisture, lube and bodily fluids
  • Extra-large butt plugs, for consummate professionals, these can either be very long or very wide or both, the options depend on personal preference as to which sensation you like the most
  • Butt plugs with cock rings – say no more – double trouble
  • Wireless butt plugs, a variation on the vibrating plug but with a remote control or controlled via an app on your phone.  Handing over control to someone else can be very kinky, you never know when you will feel those good vibrations.  These have been used in online digital relationships – saucy!

What anal toys are there other than butt plugs?

Butt plugs and vibrators account for quite a large proportion of the offerings in the anal sex toy market but there are some other alternatives one of which is anal beads.  Some people start with anal beads as an introduction to butt plugs but some established butt plug users prefer anal beads as they offer a different sensation.

Anal beads are a series of small balls usually graduated in size and these are inserted slowly one at at a time.  Beginners usually start with three or four beads.  The difference between anal beads and a butt plug is that once the butt plug is in place, the sphincter muscle closes but with the beads, it opens and closes after each bead creating a kinda popping sensation.  Most bead users like the effect of the beads being removed which is one of the joys of anal beads.  They can be slowly moved in and out, it’s a completely different vibe to a butt plug.

For guys only, the prostate massager is designed totally for male pleasure and are curved to reach the prostate.  Prostate orgasms are amongst the best.  Some prostate massagers also come with a vibrating option. View our beginners guide to anal beads for more info

Stay safe and clean

Whichever anal sex toy you use, good hygiene is really important.  Any sex toy can facilitate the transmission of STIs and anal sex toys have the added issue of bacteria from the rectum which, if it gets in the wrong place, can cause yeast infections and bacterial vaginosis.

Try and make your hygienic ritual part of your sexual pleasure, then it won’t seem so sterile and antiseptic.  Take a bath beforehand, very cleansing and relaxing, ideal for anal play and sex.  Keep baby wipes within reach – remember to choose ones which are both scent and alcohol-free.  Use lube from a dispenser not a tube.  If you are sharing a butt plug then put a condom on it.

Wash your sex toys after use. A bowl of mild soapy water is ideal or you can use a proprietary sex toy cleaner.

Can anyone use anal sex toys?

Theoretically, anyone can use an anal sex toy, the key is getting the sizing right and finding the one that really ticks your boxes sexually.  Some physical conditions mean that anal play or using a sex toy might not be recommended.  People that fall into this category include those who suffer from haemorrhoids which are swollen veins in the anus wall caused by numerous things including pregnancy.  These can be really uncomfortable when people pass stools, can become irritated and even bleed so using anal toys will probably not be a pleasant experience.

Those people who have anal fissures – a small tear in the lining of the anus – which can be caused by something as simple as constipation may also find anal sex toys uncomfortable.  And they are not recommended for some men who have defined prostate problems, this is something to speak to your doctor about.

Anal sex toys come with a lot to recommend them and that’s a scientist’s verdict.  For men, it is quite easy to see how the benefits stack up but watch out guys, anal sex toys are also a great option for women and you might just find yourself kicked out of the bedroom.